Wholebody Focusing: A conversation between Katrijn and Karen


“It only becomes fun when there is a real problem”

When I practice clowning this sentence feels so right for me. My clown can be so alive when my clowning partner offers me a situation I cannot respond in an obvious way. The search for my own right action brings up creativity, emotion, honesty and so much joy.

In my daily life fun is often hard to find when struggling with the problems life is offering me. I get caught up, lose myself and my connection to others. I am running on a treadmill like a little mouse.

Meeting my focusing partner in a whole body way. Checking in with ourselves and each other. Both connecting to our grounded presence (ME here) and the large container of the WE. I discoverer how I need this connection for my nervous system to calm down. My connection to my grounded self, the presence of my partner helps me to fully acknowledge, formulate and express my frustration in a grounded way to my partner. My partner receives, me. There is an opening up for real meeting, more humanity and so much joy fills me.

“It only becomes fun when the real problem gets grounded”

Katrijn Van Loock, M.Psy. (Belgium)


Grounded Presence Creates Safety  in We Here.  New Doorways open, showing me a new  and surprising experience of Me.

I feel joy and relief when a friend  shares feelings of anger and frustration, apparently, with me.

We take some time to arrive fully and wholly into our body’s experience of  We Here.   Inside of this spacious and alive meeting place, I can hear and take in your feelings of anger and frustration.  Your sharing of so-called “negative feeling states”  lands in me with Joy and Relief.  Something comes alive in me, fed by the life in your genuine heartfelt sharing.

Your beauty and inner light shine through your words and felt senses   It comes to me, there is a whole person here.  I trust you, I feel blessed you are  in my life.   I can recognize by own role contributing to your frustration and anger without defensiveness or resistance.  We began by choosing to create a safe living container of We Here in shared Grounded Presence.  Everything seems to have life in it  when it is held and welcomed in this way.clouds

I remember situations when a friend or loved one was caught up by their felt senses and inner states, not able to make space for themselves or for me.  The flow of life got stopped.  We could not move forward with our relational issues.

Wholebody Focusing in Heartfelt Connection and Grounded Presence makes it safe for me to meet your negative states, make space for you and for me inside of the situation, and walk through that doorway of intimacy with you.  I discover a new sense of myself, standing on my own two feet, alive and open, connected and genuine, because of You, because of We.

Karen Whalen , Ph.D. (Canada)

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